The hoarder next door....

For the past few days, all of my makeover projects have been in abeyance as we have friends coming over for dinner and a sleepover therefore the state of the house has become an urgent priority.

The main issue is the dining room, which, as always, has performed the function of storage unit for the past few months, containing...

• Spare stuff from when we sold our little caravan.
• Spare stuff from when we bought the campervan.
• Spare stuff from when I sold my workroom storage units.
• All the stuff needed for the downstairs cloakroom makeover.
• All the stuff we can't usually find a place for but which can't be got rid of.
• Literally, the new kitchen sink which arrived in a massive, hulking, great box.

I don't know if you ever watch The Hoarder Next Door on TV.  Any time I've seen it I've smugly thought to myself that at least we don't have any rooms in the house which are THAT bad.   However, to my endless mortification, I have to admit, that recently, the dining room has reached those proportions.

I know I'm prone to exaggeration for comic effect but honestly, I couldn't even bear to look at it.  Admittedly I did go in there a few times (well, just inside the door) to assess the scale of the project, and moved a few things around in a desultory fashion.... a bit like stirring a very chunky soup.... but within a short time I simply lost the will to live and beat a hasty retreat, closing the door firmly behind me.

However, with guests coming, I had no choice.  If we were to dine in the actual dining room then I had to just knuckle down and get on with it. 

Scene:  Door of the dining room.  Sandra is preparing to attempt an assault on the South Col of the dining room, a risky and dangerous mission to reach the summit via the glacial tabletop and treacherous north face of the Box Mountain.  As she fastens her crampons, adjusts her goggles and tests her safety rope, as small furry presence materialises at her feet.

Me:*briskly* Oh, hello SD.  I was hoping you'd appear!

SD: *incredulously*  MUMMMM.... whot AR yue doen?!

Me:*limbering up* I have to tidy the dining room.  We've got friends coming to dinner.

SD:*disbelievingly* Kant yue eet owtside?  Ai meen.... just LUKE att it!

Me:*stretching hamstrings* 'Fraid not... weather forecast isn't good so we need the dining room.

SD: *splutteringly* Butt.... itts goen too taik yue aijes.  Posiblie munths.  Ther kude be ENITHING hiden in thair.

Me: *stretching triceps* Well, yes.  I expect there'll be spiders.  There are always spiders.  

SD: *forcefully* Spydurs ar the veri leest of itt.  Aim thinken tygrs!  Lyons! Woolvs!

Me: *hesitantly* Oh don't exaggerate SD. There's no way there could be anything like that in there.

SD:*raised eyebrow*

Me:*falteringly* That's just silly.  Isn't it?  I mean, there couldn't be anything really dangerous, could there?

SD:*placatingly* Probablie knott.  Orl aim sayen is a elifant kude hyde in thair and yude nevir kno.

Me:*appraisingly* Well.... yes, now that you mention it. There is an awful lot of stuff.  Perhaps I'm not adequately prepared for such an undertaking.  Maybe I'll have a think about it and make a start tomorrow.

SD:*encouragingly* Ecksillint eyedeer.  Ai thinc yue shude go and hav a larj geeantee and relacks.  

Me:*gratefully* What a good plan SD.  I honestly don't know what I'd do without your support and sage counsel.

SD smiles and gradually fades away....

Thinking aloud.....

I think I'm just starting to get the hang of this retirement thing, but I have to admit that I do miss the cut and thrust of 'internashunal bizness'.   However, I still have a small supply of little undressed dolls, and lots of lovely fabrics, ribbons and trimmings so I'm planning on making a few dressed dolls soon, just to keep my hand in.  I've been revisiting my 'doll ideas' boards on Pinterest and have started a new little notebook to jot down ideas.   La Mignonette has been seriously denuded of little dolls, as many of the ones I made specially for it have now been sold, so I need to replenish its stock over the coming months.

I'm also musing on offering some sort of Christmas kit this year.... not a full scale, all-singing, all-dancing 25 kit Advent Box like I did last year, from which I still haven't fully recovered... but perhaps a 12-day box of numbered kits, which will make up into a little miniature vignette.  I've already started garnering ideas, some of which are clearly unworkable, but the germ of a plan is beginning to form so I'll see how it goes.  I'd need to have a working prototype completed by the beginning of September if I'm to have time to work up a complete set of kits in time for the end of November.

If I do pull it off there will only be 10 kit boxes available as I can't face the many weeks of work involved in making more.  I may also produce one new festive-themed toy doll kit later in the year, as I'm having serious withdrawal symptoms from all things Mignonette.

So with just 24 weeks till Christmas (!?!?!) I'd better get my thinking cap on....

La Mignonette makeover.... Part 2

Long time readers of this nonsense blog will know that my usual modus operandii is most accurately illustrated by this....

Therefore nobody is more surprised than me that I'm positively galloping along with my La Mignonette makeover.

A few weeks ago I set up its new home in my new craft room.

As it's basically a corner shop, it's only fitting that it sits in a corner, so I used a Kallax double cube unit on its end, with a storage box in the base for bits and pieces related to the build.

With the empty shop in situ on the unit, I glued two walls in place to form the back of the top floor.  I had already wallpapered all the interior walls and painted the exterior walls.

Having painted and decorated the wall units, I installed light bulbs in the top of each section.  I had never tidied all the wires leading to the plug sockets on the back of the building, so I took several hours to cut them all to length and re-fit the plugs, so that there are now no trailing wires at the back.  As there are 15 individual light fittings over the three floors I had to install an additional socket strip, which, of course, meant having to have an extra transformer.

Here are the wall units in place on the new top floor.....  I'm going to have the fronts of each floor fully removeable, to give better access to the rooms, but I'm debating whether to add some additional structural support at the fronts in the shape of 2 columns, to help support the ceilings/roof.

I've decided that the the exterior of the top floor looks a bit bare and nondescript.  I'm going to make curtains for all three windows, nevertheless, the frontage is lacking a certain je ne sais quoi.  So I'm going to add open shutters to the two side windows, and an elaborate pediment to the large central window.

Still more finishing touches to complete, but overall I'm pleased with progress and can now turn my attention to the interiors.

To be continued....

La Mignonette Makeover.... Part 1

I'm taking a few days off from ALL the other makeover projects to concentrate on taking a run at my La Mignonette building works.  I'm quite literally 'raising the roof' to add another storey on top of the existing shop and workshop/doll's hospital, in order to accommodate all the lovely dolls, toys and games from my erstwhile day nursery roombox.

Fortunately I never glued the mansard roof onto the top, otherwise this damn fine plan would have fallen at the first hurdle.  So far I've painted the exterior walls and wallpapered the interior walls prior to the actual build.  One of the bugbears of the upper storey kit is the slablike front wall so I just had to put a window in.  On the first floor of La Mignonette, Mlle Emilie's workroom, I installed French doors leading out onto a little balcony.  On the second floor I've opted for quite a large window, which will have railings along the front, mirroring the balcony and windows on the first floor, hopefully tying the overall Frenchified design together.   

I don't have curtains on any of the other windows so I'm going to go to town on the new top floor and will make some opulent silk curtains, with swags and drapes, and tasselled tie-backs. 

As this room is going to showcase my large collection of tiny toys and games, I decided to put shelved units all along two walls, and as I want to colour coordinate them to the decor, I opted for bare wood shelving units with removeable/adjustable shelving.   I've used this type of shelving in many different projects and never had any issues before, but not this time.

You would think, wouldn't you, that the whole point of having removeable shelving is that you can actually remove the shelving so you can adjust them?  Every other display shelf like this I've bought before had little wooden strips between each section of shelving, which were attached with double sided sticky tape, so that they could easily pop off, so that the shelves could be slid out.

For some reason now though, some bright spark in the design team has decided that those wooden strips should be GLUED down.

With HEAVY DUTY INDUSTRIAL GLUE!

Which meant that prising them off took big chunks out of the shelves AND the strips.   I am beyond incensed.   What should have been a 5 minute job, taking out the shelves, turned into a marathon session requiring a screwdriver, craft knife and small hammer.

And swearing.

LOTS of swearing.

I came close, several times, to throwing the whole bally lot out the window.

When I'd finally prised off the wooden strips, I then had to make good the damage.  Shaving off chunks of glued, splintered wood, from both the display units and the strips.  Which, obviously, didn't improve my mood any.

So I have four of these.  The one on the left shows the original unit, with the three wooden strips in situ.  On the right, after about an hour of cursing, is a unit with the sodding strips ripped off, followed by meticulous shaving and sanding to remove all the glued/splintered chunks of wood. 

In the past I've replaced the acrylic shelves with wooden ones, but I might just paint the acrylic ones as I'm losing the will to live with the whole thing.

To be continued.....

Campervan Makeover.... Part 3

I had an exciting delivery today.  I've been avidly following it's progress all the way from Santa Cruz, via Los Gatos, San Jose, Carson and Los Angeles International Airport... thence to Heathrow,  Coventry (?!) to its delivery today. 

You never quite know exactly what you're going to get when you order something online but it was an understatement to say I was delighted with my purchase.  

I'm aiming for an exotic, boho vibe in the campervan and had been looking for a suitable fabric for curtains, cushions and, most importantly, bunting for weeks.  I had a particular yen for a small paisley print fabric, but couldn't find anything which ticked all my boxes.  It had to be 100% cotton, a small print and available in several different colours.

Paisley is an ornamental design which consists of curved teardrop shapes.  The form is of Persian origin but the textile design, cramming many of them into a rich pattern is Indian.  The English name for the patterns derives from the town of Paisley in the west of Scotland, a centre  for textiles where paisley designs were produced.   So also a nod to the land of my birth.

When I finally found this fabric on Etsy I couldn't believe my luck, especially as it was available in 16 colours, neatly fulfilling my brief.

Naturally I couldn't wait to get started and immediately abandoned what I was doing (clearing the dining room actually) and set about preparing to create completely unique bunting.

Scene: Sandra's craft room. She is surrounded by a cornucopia of colourful fabrics, and sits, head bowed, sewing some tiny silver bells onto the first bunting flag.  As she quietly curses, as small furry presence materialises on her lap.

Me:*sighing* Oh hello SD.  Am I pleased to see YOU!

SD:*nodding* Yess.  Ai eckspeckt yue ar.  Whott AR yue doen?

Me:*faintly* What does it look like?  I'm making bunting of course.

SD:*questioningly*  Bye hand?

Me:*teeth gritted* No. Not by hand.  I am using the sewing machine to stitch the fabric flags but these bells and tassels need to be hand sewn.

SD:*incredulously* Tassils?  Bells? 

Me:*combatatively* Yes.  HANDMADE tassels.

SD:*speechless* Yure MAKEN the TASSILS?  Ar yue kompleetlie madd?  Yue kan bye them on Eebai for a fue pens eetch.

Me:*deflatedly* Yes.  I know.  I don't know what I was thinking.  Except Ebay tassels are paltry things and the colours are all bold and brassy.  If I make them myself I can match then EXACTLY to the colours of the bunting flags.  They'll look much classier.

SD:*speculatively* Hmm.... and hows thatt goen?

Me:*verging on tears* It's not.  It took me nearly an hour to make the first tassel and that's not including sewing it on to the flag and adding the bells.  At this rate the bunting will be finished sometime in 2026. 

SD:*encouragingly* Butt itt dose luke fantastick.  Orl kompleetlie handmayd... veri impresiv.

Me:*falteringly* Thanks SD.  I will get quicker. Just need to get the hang of the tassels.  They're tricksy little buggers I can tell you.

SD:*reassuringly* Aim shure yue will.  Doant evin wurrie. Yule sune be maken tassils liek theres kno twomorow.   Butt ar the tinie silvur bels reeli nessessarie?

Me:*weakly* No.  Not in the slightest.  Just thought they added a quirky boho 'je ne sais quoi'

SD:*thoughtfully* Hmmm.  Aim shure yore rite.  Kwirkie and bohoe... deffinitlie the wai to go. Aill lett yue gett on then.

Me:*rallying* Thanks for the encouragement SD.  I'll crack on then.  

SD gradually fades away and after a few moments, Sandra blows her nose and resumes her labours. 

To be continued......

Craftroom Makeover.... Part 4 +

The title more accurately should have read Craftroom Makeover Part 4 in conjunction with La Mignonette Makeover Part 1 but that makes me sound more than ordinarily crazy so....

In line with recent trials and tribulations, this morning I decided to get on with painting the wall in the craft room, reasoning that it would probably only take an hour and be another thing usefully ticked off my burgeoning To Do lists.

So I got out all the decorating stuff.... dust sheets, paint trays, brushes, rollers, and the 10 year old tin of paint.  True to expectations, when I finally jemmied the lid off, the sludge inside was a shade of snot green.  No amount of mixing, sieving or swearing could convince it to return to its original lovely shade of blue so in the end I decided to cut my losses and head off to B&Q for another tin.  

After sitting in a broiling hot car for 45 minutes on a journey that should have taken only 10 due, to ongoing road works on my chosen route, I arrived at the hardware store, sweaty and disgruntled and set about finding the paint amongst eleventy aisles containing every paint known to man (or woman).  Naturally, after 10 years, they'd changed the appearance of the container, and added another half dozen finishes, of which matt was not one.  I wandered up and down each aisle several times, trailing a little basket on wheels, scanning shelf after shelf for my preferred colour and finish.  I finally found it right at the back of a bottom shelf, which necessitated my getting down on my hands and knees and crawling in to fish it out.  That was the easier part.  Getting back out and upright again was more of a challenge.  After a bit of huffing and puffing I managed to reverse out, covered in cobwebs and dust.  I knelt on all fours for a minute or two to catch my breath and get my bearings, then set about working out how to get up. If I'd had a proper shipping trolley I might have been OK, but the flimsy little basket on wheels just didn't cut it.  I briefly contemplated hauling myself up on the shelving but the thought of pulling it over onto myself along with several hundred heavy paint containers, causing certain instant death, didn't much appeal.  

I knelt there for a little while trying to work out a strategy, all the while hoping that some kind person would come along to whom I could appeal for help.  Strangely, although some people did start down the aisle, when they saw a little old lady on her hands and knees on the floor, perspiring profusely and uttering entirely unladylike words, they thought better of it and turned tail.  Eventually, by building several different height towers of paint cans and using them to aid pushing myself up from the floor, I was able to get perpendicular, where a sudden bout of dizziness forced me to sit down on the closest pile of paint cans for a few minutes to regain my composure.  All in all, an extremely undignified and unpleasant episode which I don't care to repeat any time soon.

By the time I got back home, by a different, quicket route, PP was getting ready to deploy a search party but I was in no mood for discussion on the whys and wherefores of my extended absence.  Several hours later, the wall is painted, but it's looking a bit patchy so I'll let it dry overnight and re-assess things tomorrow.  

I also had a bit of a brainwave to make the adding of an additional storey onto La Mignonette a 'two birds with one stone' thingamajig'.

Because I'd had paint left over from painting the room back when I was building La Mignonette, and because I loved the colour so much, I used it to paint the exterior.  The new top floor has to match so I had a sudden flash of inspiration and decided to roller paint the exterior walls in their unassembled kit form state. 

Brilliant or what?

So, tomorrow I can give them a second coat and won't need to paint them when the top floor is assembled. 

All in all, not the best of days but small progress has been made so I'll take that as a win.

Campervan makeover.... Part 2

I've spend many hours over the past week (while I SHOULD have been doing other things) working on the campervan.   Making new covers for the six seat cushions and backs took all of THREE DAYS.  

This is what the original cushions looked like....

So.... sort of dung coloured, with stripes of corpse grey, enlivened with patches of bleargh beige.  Just not my thing AT ALL.

Here's what the same cushion looks like now....

It took me a l-o-n-g time to select that particular shade of blue out of eleventy different hues.  It's called hyacinth... not my usual go-to sky blue, but I wanted something a bit deeper and bluer.  The fabric is a polar fleece and really quite cheap.  It's washable, which is a bonus too.  

Having completed the seat cushions I then turned my attention to jooshjing up the kitchen area, which hitherto had an expanse of beige melamine at the end.

I found some very cheap (£1.50 for 10!!!) stick-on tiles from SHEIN.  Due to the price and the provenance I honestly wasn't expecting very much, but when they arrived I was pleasantly surprised, as the colours were vibrant and they felt quite good quality.

I have to admit that tiling, in all its forms, is not my forte.  However, as these tiles could easily be cut with scissors or a craft knife I felt cautiously optimistic that I could do a reasonable job.

It would have been immeasurably easier if there had been a single straight, plumb line in the entire van, and I quickly discovered that I would have to go off piste and play it by ear.  Admittedly there was a modicum of indecorous language and at points I seriously questioned why I'd ever started, but after several hours I'd achieved this....

After much deliberation I decided to go with a random tile pattern, rather than a predictable repeating one, which I felt really wasn't in the spirit of a quirky little van. 

Have you ANY idea how difficult it is to do random?  I had to work really hard to avoid repeats in rows and/or columns.  Despite that, I'm sure a few have slipped in but overall I'm pleased with how it's turned out.  

Now I have to wait for the lovely, quirky fabrics  for the curtains, small cushions and bunting to arrive. USPS informs me that

Your item arrived at our USPS facility in SAN JOSE CA DISTRIBUTION CENTER on June 2, 2023 at 9:23 pm. The item is currently in transit to the destination.

Since then I've heard nothing, so whether it's still languishing in San Jose, or is already winging its way over the Atlantic I have no idea.  

I've also made this to go on a little felt notice board on the cab bulkhead....

OK, so it's a traditional VW campervan, totally unlike ours, but it was the only campervan template I could find so it will have to do. 

Meanwhile, debate continues on a name for her.  I favour Florrie but PP is unsure.  

So.... lots of work but I'm pleased with how she's looking so far.