Sunday 7 October 2018

Armageddon - Day 3

With the workroom now at Maximum Mess, I've hit a wall.

I keep wandering in, slowly turning round while I assess the mayhem, then skulking back out again...defeated.

I think the problem is, and bear with me here, I've now created pockets of empty space, and I don't know what to do with them.  I've always worked on the basis that empty spaces are there to be filled, so I'm struggling with the concept of leaving them empty.

You'd think, wouldn't you, that as I've been gradually downsizing the contents of the workroom for what feels like forever, I'd be glad to finally get to the point where I can clearly see the results of my labours.

Surely, empty spaces are A Good Thing?

I think I need to reboot my brain in order to see the room as half full, rather than half empty.

Even Small Dog is perplexed.

Scene: Sandra's workroom, which seems to have exploded.  Small Dog wanders in, carefully placing her tiny paws in the miniscule areas of clear space on the floor and surveys the devastation.

SD: *incredulously*  Mumm.... seeriyuslie.... WTF?!
Me: *chastingly* Language SD?!
SD: *chastised* Sorrie mumm.... butt reelie..... W. T. aktewl. F thoe?
Me: *sighing* Yes.  I agree.  I don't know WHAT I was thinking.
SD:*tries to find a space to sit, gives up and perches on a pile of papers* Iff yue doant mined me sayen... thiss iss anuthr fyne mess yuve gott yorself intoo.
Me:*defeatedly*  Yes.  You're right of course SD.  I thought it would be done and dusted by now.  I'm exhausted though, and it just keeps getting worse and worse.
SD: *soothingly* Doant wurrie mumm..... itts onlie a littel bitt wurs than ewsual. Hav yue konsiderd getten a skipp?
Me: *resignedly* Hmm.... or a black hole.  Perhaps if I had a black hole I could just sweep it all inside and just forget about it.
SD:*carefully*  Off korse.... thiss is reelie displaismint aktivitie... isent itt?
Me:*bristling* Displacement activity?!  Not at all.  This is a completely justified exercise... absolutely necessary in order to reorganise and consolidate, and sort out, and..... *trails off guiltily*
SD:*triumphant* Ha... ai new itt!  Yue hav maid this dogollmitey mess in ordur to avoyd doen UTHUR stuf that yue hav to do.  Yue hav maid the wurkroom kompleetlie unewsible DELIBURRAITLIE!
Me: *thoughtfully* Hmm... you know you may have something there SD.  I hadn't realised....
SD: *warming to her theme* Ai thort so. Yue ar avoyen doen yore tacks arent yue?
Me:*deflatedly* Well yes.... I need to complete my tax self assessment and submit it... but...
SD:*interrupting* And alsew.... yore buke.  Yue shude be wurken on yore buke.
Me: *firmly* Ah, now there I HAVE been making progress.  I have completely restructured it because it just wasn't working as it was.  Granted there's still a lot to do, but I'm much happier with the new format.
SD:*encouragingly* Gude!  Wel dunn.  Sew if yue kan jusst cleer upp this terribul mess yue kan gett on with itt thenn.
Me: *enthusiastically* Yes! Yes, I will! Thank you so much for this little chat SD.  You've helped enormously!
SD: *smugly* Kno problimm.   Yore welkumm.  Happie to helpp. 

A few minutes later, alerted to the sound of clicky tapping from the office....

Me:*calling from the workroom* SD.... are you using my laptop?  You are, aren't you?  What are you doing?
SD: *brightly* Neerlie phinished mumm.... aim just adden 'Moativashunal Speeker' to mai Cee Vee......
Me: *sigh*

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