Unintended consequences.....

I've been in my workroom almost every single day since the lockdown started, and the extended occupation has taken its toll.

Things came to a head yesterday, when finally, unable to find a single square inch of free space on ANY surface (and yes, I do include the floor) I was forced to bite the proverbial bullet, pull up my big girl pants, roll up my sleeves and set to.

Many hours later, much colourful language, and a modicum of blood, sweat and tears, my workroom has been restored to almost pristine glory.

What?

You want proof?

Sheesh... it comes to something when a girl's word is disbelieved.....

OK... I give you.....

*insert drum roll here*

Tah Dah!

My upcycled bureau cabinet, with doors, drawers and drop-down flap all closed! 

*My 'thinking' chair has been excavated from beneath piles of boxes

 *Last year, when I bought this colourful little club chair, I fondly imagined sitting comfortably in it, with one of my lovely notebooks, jotting down ideas, making lists and generally channeling the spirit of Virginia Woolf (as in A Room Of One's Own).  Needless to say, Small Dog and our little granddaughter (pre-lockdown) have spend more time in it than I have, and it frequently serves as an extra shelf.

This never happens

Neither does this.... a clear table top

Nor this.... such a delight to be able to access all those drawers without having to relocate piles of stuff...

Except.... now that it's properly tidy for the first time in months, I can't bring myself to go in there to do any actual work, knowing that within a matter of minutes, as if by magic, Stuff will appear on every work surface.

I was surveying the room from the doorway earlier, wondering at the sunlight glinting off the miraculously empty surfaces, when I felt a slight nudge, and looking down, spied Small Dog standing on the threshold.

She glanced at me, then executed an overly dramatic, comedy staggering into the room, accompanied by much eye rolling.

Me: *miffed* Oh very funny.  Hilarious even. 
SD: *innocently* Oh. Mai. Dogg!  Whott has evin happinnd in hear?  Hav we bean burgld?  Whair is evrithing?
Me: *bristling* Pack it in SD.  You know full well I've been tidying up in here.  That's why you made yourself scarce when I asked you to help.
SD: *obliviously* Is.... is thatt.... a CHARE?
Me: *sighing* Yes. Yes it is.
SD: *exultantly*  A chare fore...... SITTEN ONN?
Me: *grudgingly* Yes, well, I'll grant you it has been used as a supplementary storage area for a while.....
SD: *interrupting* With kumphie kooshuns!
Small Dog strolls nonchalantly across the uncluttered carpet and stands expectantly by the chair.  Due to her advancing years she is no longer able to leap up onto chairs, so she has to be lifted, carefully.  
I comply.
She settles down on the chair and surveys the room.
SD: *incredulously* Yore kabinett.... the doars aktewlie cloas!
Me: *tetchily* Yes of course they do.  I normally leave them open while I'm working so that I can easily get to all my ribbons.
SD: *wonderingly* And youre nue tabell.  It hass a..... *pause for effect*  flatt topp?
Me: *firmly* Right.  That's enough of that.  It's impossible to do what I do AND maintain  completely clear work surfaces....
SD: *placatingly* Oh yess... ai kno.  Kreeativ kayoss and ol thatt.  Butt now yue hav a CHARE whitsh kan be aktewlie satt on. Ai mite kum inn to keap yue kumpanie.  Maibea when yue ar haven a kupp of tee and a biskitt?
Me: *defeatedly* Yes of course SD.  I'll let you know the next time that happens.
SD: *triumphantly* Fyne.... aill jusst settel dowun heer and hav a littel knapp.  Trie knott to maik too mutsch noyse.
Me: *sigh*

Fin