Amidst the chaos of preparations for Kensington on Saturday, we took a few hours out of our busy schedule to visit the new Tesco superstore which opened on Monday. This cathedral of conspicuous consumer consumption is a veritable behemoth, massive in every sense of the word and the latest state-of-the-art jewel in Tesco's glittering crown.
As it occupies the site of the old store, which was demolished early this year and is just half a mile from where we live, we have had to schlep way across town for shopping and petrol. So to have a shiny new store re-open feels like Christmas has come early.
However, Monday was most definitely not the best day to visit, as the unbridled curiosity of everyone within a 20 mile radius meant the crowds were 'solid state'. In fact, after a brief shuffle around we abandoned the attempt and returned late afternoon, when the crowds were marginally less and we could replenish our stores with the plethora of special opening offers.
Our joy is tempered by the fact that it will henceforth take several hours to do a weekly shop, due partly to the unfamiliar store layout and partly to the fact that we don't want to miss any bargains, so trailing up and down EVERY endless aisle is essential.
And finally, partly because, with Christmas just around the corner, the store is blinged up to the eyeballs with seasonal stuff, accompanied by an endless playing of the obligatory "20 Christmas Songs You Never Want To Hear Ever Again"
All together now.........."Oh I Wish It Could Be Christmas Every Day..........So Here It Is Merry Christmas............ Last Christmas, I Gave You My Heart...............