It's official......

It's official.  I am a slattern. 

slat·tern 

noun

1. a slovenly, untidy woman or girl.

2. a slut; harlot.

And before you ask, I refer to the first definition.  Obviously.

I expect each region has its own word(s) for such a person..... my Scottish Grannie would have referred to her as a 'clarty besom'.

Don't get me wrong.  I like things as clean, neat and tidy as the next person (so long as she's not a slattern) but I challenge anyone who has no pressing need to get behind built-in cupboards, heavy bookshelves and the like, for, let's say, 10 years, not to discover dirt and ming clinging to the skirting boards, walls and woodwork which have been inaccessible all that time.

True, I could have pulled out the storage units on wheels and had a good go behind it, or hauled out all the storage boxes under the desk to hoover, but...... I didn't.

I am shocked and appalled at the mess which is being revealed as the workroom is emptied.  

I blush to think what my Grannie would have said.  There are things growing and mutating under the storage units which would give primordial slime a run for its money.

It will take more than a bucket of sugar soap solution and a chamois leather to sort that lot out.

Not only that, whole legions of spiders, having been ousted from the moulds cupboard (and I feel I should perhaps clarify here that the moulds in question are plaster casting moulds, not the penicillin variety) have scuttled down the back of the cupboards and are massing there, waiting for me to start dismantling the run of units, at which point they will swarm out all over me.

I'm SO looking forward to that.