Tuesday 9 May 2017

A modern day parable.....

For lo...it came to pass that yesterday The Work commenced on our shower room.  Three wise men arrived from the East (Bexhill actually) and there was much banging and thumping, and running up and down of the stairs.

And for a short while it was good.

But then it was not so good.

For they began with all the power tools and it did sound as though the Horsemen of the Apocalypse did ride, iron shod, throughout all of the upstairs.

With trumpets.

And then, as if all that were not bad enough, a great mystical sign did appear upon the sitting room ceiling.  And they did look upon it with great sadness.

For lo... water had escaped mightily beneath the floor, and it forthwith soaked through the ceiling boards and formed damp, arcane shapes.

And there was wailing and gnashing of teeth, and rending of garments when they said

"Oh, that will dry out no bother"

Thenceforth the day, it passed slowly, with the noise, and the dust, and the running up and down of the stairs, till eventually the skip ranneth over, and they declared that all was good.

Except for the marks on the ceiling, which had been multiplying and begetting more damp patches all day.

And so, they layeth down their tools and went home.

Later in the evening, feeling cold, and being desirous of hot water, we tried to use the central heating.

But central heating was there none.  Likewise hot water.  For the boiler was buggered, leading to more of the wailing and gnashing of teeth.

Yea, heeding our plaintive cries, one of the Wise Men returned, having had not even his dinner, and commenced with more of the running up and down the stairs, and the ritual bleeding of the radiators, and the having to go back home to retrieve the mystical water sucking machine.

And as the darkness fell, he yet declared that all was well, although, verily, he was sweating buckets and declared that he had divined "the mother and father of all air locks" the likes of which he had never before seen.

He did again look at the ceiling, and a great sadness descended upon him, for he knew it would need a complete new coat of paint.

Here endeth the lesson......

2 comments:

elizabeth s said...

Verily Verily I say unto thee,
Thou did suffereth Much by the departing of the hot waters and dispersion of it upon thy ceiling above.

Sandra Morris said...

Yea... and lo, it has got much worse since then!